...into and through an incredible journey!

The whole team is back in the US! After many hours in airports, planes and lines, everyone is home! What a journey it was too!

I can't thank everyone enough for the prayers and support. There is probably a lot of you who don't want to read through anymore post now that we are home, however, I know that the days and weeks to come will reveal more about this trip and God. There was so much that he taught me along the way and as I reflect and process through it all, he is faithful to help me understand.

From the beginning of this journey God really had to work in me to make it less about me and more about what he wanted to do through me. Even down to the reasoning for going on this trip had some selfish motives behind it. It didn't take long before the humbling experience of these kids started to transform my heart into worshiping God.

Visiting Maria's Big House of Hope and seeing some of the special needs that these orphans had really cause me to ask some questions and even question God. I didn't, and still don't, fully understand why there is so much suffering among precious children. I wanted to make this trip about these orphans instead of making the trip about God because I didn't understand what he was trying to do through these kids. Something that God showed me through some of our team time was that regardless of what is going on in the lives of these kids, they are still his children and he still loves them unconditionally.

Although I was questioning God in some areas, he was still faithful to show himself to me and come through in other areas. One of my biggest prayers prior to this trip was that God would work in the hearts of our team to join together and work for him. God totally blessed me with the team I was able to travel and work with. I have never known someone for such a small amount of time, yet felt so close to them. Every person on our team was so different but they brought so much to our team. Saying goodbye to that team was so incredibly hard. They all hold such a special place in my heart.

God always has a plan, and he is willing to lead us if we are willing to let him. My personality is one that wants to know the big picture before I agree to take the next step. This isn't how God works and it isn't that kind of faith he has called us to. The Lord was faithful to show me that he is leading me to the next step of my journey. I don't know where I will ultimately end up with my life, I don't know if I will spend the rest of my life in China caring for orphans, but I do know that there is a path God has put me on. My desire is to follow this path, regardless of how far down the path I can see. He is so much greater than I am, and I want to trust that his plan is so much greater than I could ever imagine for myself.

Please continue to pray for the children at Maria's! They all need healing, they all need families and they all need to someday experience a relationship with the father that will never leave them!

...into understanding

Our team has left Maria's Big House of Hope and we are back in Beijing. Saying good bye to a place like Maria's is not something that you can easily do. All of the team spent time getting to know these kids and we all had kids that had stolen a piece of our heart. It is also hard because we no longer have the joy of the kids to lift our spirits as we continue to process through our trip and what God has taught each of us. 

During our week at Maria's I had a lot of questions about what was going on in my heart and why God does what he does. Like I have said before, there is no experience like this trip. But there is also probably nothing I have done that has been as difficult as this. Trying to find the answers to these questions is not really something that comes quickly, if ever! 

The conversations we have been able to have among the team now that we are away from Maria's and beginning to process, have been extremely beneficial. God not only touched our hearts, provided for our needs and taught us about himself, but he also gave us a family of team members who are also going through the same thing. For that I am truly thankful. 

On a lighter note, today we were able to do some sight seeing! We got to go to The Great Wall and to Tianamin Square. It was such a blessing to be able to enjoy some fun time with the team. It was a hot day but we all enjoyed it none the less. Over the pass couple of days we have also been able to pick up some souviniers by bargaining! If you have never bargained with a Chinese street vendor you are missing out! The fun of bargaining is almost better than the stuff you get. Anyway, overall it has been great getting to continue to spend time with the team and learn more about China. 

Please continue to pray for my team and I. Pray that we will all be able to process and learn from God after the trip. Pray for safe travel back to the states. Pray for the staff we left behind at Maria's. Pray that the kids back at Maria's would someday know a forever family. Pray that the kids who will only be on this earth for a little while longer are shown Gods love while they are here. 

Thank you all for all of your prayers. 

...to the reality of His Glory.

As our time here at Maria's comes to a close there is so much that I am challenged by. We have spent some of our time here going through "training," in which we learned so much about orphan care, including what we can do once we get home. Just from talking with all of you, I know there is a lot of people in my circle who are interested in orphans in some way. My hearts biggest desire is that God would touch your heart like he has touched mine through these kids. 

I know that a lot of you will want to here my story when I get home and I also know that I will not be able to convey to you the entirety of this experience. However, if any of you who are reading this blog want to hear about any of it, I would be thrilled to talk to you. A fair warning, your heart will be touched in some way. 

Last night I had a chance to catch some of the staff in their down time and ask them about how they do what they do. The coolest thing about the way they answered is that every bit of it was about the glory of God. One of the things said was the view it as an opportunity to be one of the last ones to care for a baby who is taking their last breathe, and that even though it is hard, they are given the strength by God to get through it. 

The thoughts that are swimming around in my head are "What's next?" How do I go home and live a life back at K-State that is not only glorifying to God but showing my heart for orphans and for China? I want to continue in this ministry and I want to convince people that this is a ministry they should come along side. So much that has to be processed through, so many stories to tell! Please be praying not only for me but for the whole team that we would really see the next step that God is has set before us. 

...into a deeper understanding of His heart.

The last couple of days has been such a whirlwind of emotions - from the crankiness of jet lag, to being distraught for these orphans. My prayer the past couple of days has been that the Lord would help me discern these feelings and help me understand what it is that he would have me learn from it. He has taught me a lot but there are still so many questions running through my head. 

Spending time playing with these kids the last couple of days has shown me the true beauty of who they are. It doesn't matter what they look like or what special need it is that they have, these are Gods children and he values them just as much as you or me. I can't help but fall in love with them as I get to know each of them more. Some have huge obstacles they will have to overcome and some will never get the chance to know life beyond MBHOH. Even though there is so much hurt, pain, and suffering, the amount of joy these kids possess wipes all of that out. 

A quick story about a little baby I was playing with today. In one of the rooms there is a child who has a severe medical condition which makes it hard for him to breathe and move. As I was playing with some of the other kids in his room I heard him fussing, so I scooted over and gave him some attention. Even though there was several other toddlers who wanted my attention I stayed by this little boy and allowed him to hold my finger as I played with the other kids. Each time I would take my finger away from him he began to cry. It really took me back how just holding a finger could make such a big difference in this little boys comfort. He just needed to know that someone was there. 

Each time I enter a room I see these beautiful kids and each time I think about the problems they are facing, but those thoughts are soon pushed to the back of my mind as I see the smiles spread across their faces. I don't think I could even count how many smiles I see in one day here at Maria's. It just blows me away that in the midst of all of this, these kids are more joyful than I am. 

My heart is so full! There is no way I will ever be able to put into words what this experience with these kids is like, even after I am back home talking to you guys face to face. This is an aspect of Gods love that I don't think many of us have ever experienced. 

Later in the day, we shared among our team some hard moments about our day, there wasn't a dry eye in the house after it was over. These kids have touched our lives in such a deep way. It has humbled me to a point I have never been at before. 

Here's a quick thought that helped get me through the last couple of days: The kids that breathe their last here at Maria's were blessed by the ministry that goes on here, the kids I have met who will only live for a little while longer have blessed me. However - this isn't the end - I get to see these kids again. One day on the other side of eternity I will praise our heavenly father along side them, but the cool thing about that is that they will have perfect heavenly bodies. How incredible. 

We are learning during our training times how God has called us to care for orphans, and also how we can do that now. My heart for this country and for these kids grows every second. I praise God that he is in control and that he is sovereign. 

I hope this post makes some sense. There are so many thoughts swimming around in my head right now. I am trying to sort through them myself. But I do want to leave you with this. 

Today I was reading an excerpt from Mary Beth Chapman's book, "Choosing to SEE." It is the book about their daughter Maria who was killed in an accident. The same Maria that this orphanage was named after.The book gives a glimpse into the life of Maria and what a blessing she was to everyone she came in contact with. Even though they didn't understand why God would take her from them, they knew that God was still faithful. The didn't know it then, but through that circumstance this place is able to exist. Because of the inspiration that Maria - a child - gave them, everyday orphans experience God's love.  Who is it that God is trying to bless you through? How is God leading you to SEE the bigger picture? 

Thanks for all your support and prayers! 

Kyle 

...to Maria's Big House of Hope!

After many miles and hours of traveling we have finally made it to our intended destination of Maria's Big House of Hope in Luoyang! As we arrived today we had the chance to meet all of the staff and then get a tour of the facility. It was so cool to finally see the place that I had been looking at in all of the videos and pictures. Again, everything travel wise went extremely well.

After our tour we had our first chance to go into the nurseries and play with the children. It took a while to adjust being with the children in their rooms since their nannies were also there to take care of them. I spent time in various rooms this afternoon with different children. From babies to walking and talking toddlers, I had the opportunity to play with lots of different age groups. It was so cool to see MBHOH and how everything here works. God has definitely blessed this place and poured his love out on the people and children here.

While I was playing with the children God really touched my heart and showed me that these are not just orphaned children in China, but they are HIS children and he loves them unconditionally. That realization totally shifted my view of these children and our purpose here. These kids are just as valuable to God as anyone else on this earth. Not only that, but God tells us in scripture that the fatherless hold a special place in his heart. These children are beautiful creations of God that he has called us to care for. That thought is so humbling to me.

I can't wait to learn more from this trip and spend time spreading Gods love to these kids.

...to a hotel in Beijing!

Ni hao from Beijing! We made it! After all of my team met up in San Francisco we boarded our 12 hour flight to Beijing! While in San Fran we had some great time to get to know each other. Then some great time to sleep on the flight, especially since most of us were up and to te airport around 3.

Overall it was an awesome day! Everything went very smoothly. Flights and tickets were not a problem, plus everyone of our bags got to Beijing without a problem! Praise the Father! 
After we it through all the stuff at the international terminal we took a bus to our hotel, which is very nice by the way! We met up with some of the Show Hope staff at the airport also. We got to drive through Beijing some and see te city. Unfortunately it was covered with smog. When we arrived at the hotel we got all check Ito our rooms and then went to grab some dinner. There was PIZZA of all things waiting for us in the restaurant.

Now we are all getting settled in and ready to get some real sleep in real beds! I can't express how blessed I feel to be here and how much the Father blessed ustoday with all if our travels an how smoothly they went!

PR
-the team would all get adjusted to the new time
-we would continue to work together and grow together
-continued travels tomorrow to Luoyang 

...to an Orphanage in China!

Tomorrow is the day! We fly out! In the midst of everything this morning I had to stop and just get away from it all. I took a short trip out to Manhattan Hill to spend some time with God and preparing for this trip(If you don't know what Manhattan Hill is, it is a great overlook of the city of Manhattan). I also had to stop to write this post because of the overwhelming support you all have given me.

As I was reading in Psalms this morning I was reminded how sovereign our God is. Around every corner God has, in some way, already paved the way before me. In fundraising, he totally provided even when my faith that he would started to waiver. He has time and time again shown me how amazing his love really is. He also used friends and family this summer to really pour out his love on me. I really can't even put into words how everything about this trip has fallen into place and it is so evident that it was all at the hand of God.

This is a shout out to all of my friends! Over this past week as I have been getting more and more excited, my friends have shared in that excitement with me. I have felt so overwhelmingly loved by my Christian community in ways I never could have imagined. I can't thank all of you enough for your support and prayers.

I have felt so much support and love by everyone I know as this trip has approached, so this is a shout out to all of those who helped, prayed, supported in any way!

I think I am almost all ready to go! I have a few more things to throw in the suitcase but after that I am out of here! I cannot wait to meet up with my team and serve God along side them! I am so thankful for this opportunity! Below are some prayer requests for my trip! To God be ALL the glory because HE is so amazingly Holy! (Sorry that this post jumps all over the place, if you can't tell I am a little excited and my mind is all over the place!)

Also, follow Show Hopes Blog to get more updates from my team along the way: http://showhope.org/category/show-hope-trips/

Prayer Requests:
-Unity among my team
-That God would set up divine appointments at every turn on this trip
-All of the travel will go smoothly and safely
-Humility for all of the team
-That God would continue to prepare our hearts
-Good health for all of the team members
-That above everything else, God would be glorified!

God time on Manhattan Hill 

The view form Manhattan Hill 

Almost read to go! 

...into the depths of His love!

I really shouldn't be posting right now because this guy has to get up and go to work in the morning, however, I literally cannot sleep until I get what happened tonight down in writing! I know it is long, but read it until the end, because God is crazy cool!

Tonight I had the opportunity to speak with students about campus ministries and the impact they have had in my life! I worked at a Youth church camp last summer. That same summer camp host a "College Night" where they ask collegiate ministers and college students involved in a student ministry, to come and speak with the students about how important it can be to get plugged in.

I need to preface this with what God has really been teaching me recently. As I have been preparing for my trip to China, I have been asking the Lord to show me how to really love people well. The first way God has done this is by pouring out His love on me in very obvious ways. (Read the previous post to hear more about this!)

Now we get back to this evening! Tonight while I was talking about something very close to my heart at a place that is extremely close to my heart (this summer camp is also where I accept Christ), God poured out His love in some crazy obvious ways.

First, I was able to team up with a group of some really great people, who love the Lord, to talk to all of these kids.

Second, I was also able to see some of the staff that I worked with at camp last summer! This people are so special to me due to the fact that we served along side each other for a whole summer.

Third, I had some great conversations with these friends. I think these conversations were needed by both me and my friends. This was such a God moment because it was not what I thought I was going to get out of the evening at all.

Fourth, last summer, when I worked at this camp, I had a youth group on my team that radiated God's love in a way I had never seen another group of teenagers do. They were such a blessing to us. Well this same youth group was at camp this week and I had the chance to see all of them! This was such a blessing and made my heart smile! Just another way God so obviously poured out His love!

After the team who was speaking finally stopped talking and catching up we all headed our separate ways. As I drove back to Manhattan with some other guys I had the opportunity to really praise God for what had happened that evening. I also got to share what had happened with another one of my former camp staffers over the phone.

When we got back to Manhattan I then went to hang out with some friends who had recently been out of town, I was really excited for the opportunity to get to catch up with them. Well God had other plans. We headed out to a place I call the "Beach!" Yes a beach in Manhattan, KS! Once we got out there(it is kind of the beaten path), we ran into a woman who had been enjoying the evening and lost track of time. It had gotten dark and she was afraid of walking back through the woods by herself (you have to walk through some woods to get out to the beach). She said she was very glad some other people had shown up. She began to talk to us and tell us about her life. She had a lot to say as she had dealt with a lot. My first thought was, "Ok, lady. This is not how I wanted to spend my evening. Go away so me and my friends can hang out." However, after listening to more of her story it was very evident that she really just needed some people to show her some of God's love. I very obviously heard God say, "I have poured out so much love on you in the past couple of hours, it is time for you to pass some of my love onto someone else." Thanks to a dear friend that was with us we got on the topic of God and Church. Then ended up inviting her to church with us on Sunday. She was very gracious and couldn't stop saying how nice we were.

What a crazy awesome testament to the fact that God is in control and He loves His people! All of these words don't describe how awesome and evident God's power was tonight! Praise God for all He teaches us and for the people and things He does that through!

...to a small Kansas community.

Welcome to my blog! This is the first post I have done and it is all because God is soooo good!

Your probably wondering about the title of this blog and the title of this post. Well when I created this blog I was in the corner of a coffee shop. A coffee shop where I spend a great deal of time. Although not all of my post will come from this small coffee shop, I am sure a great deal will.

Now to the meat and potatoes of this blog post! I dubbed this post, "From the corner of a coffee shop...to a small Kansas community." I did this because tonight was the last night of Vacation Bible school at my home church in Ulysses, KS. All this week during the "missions" portion of VBS the kids have been learning about China and about the trip I am going on. You see on August 1st I leave for about 2 weeks to go work with beautiful little orphans in China. Well of course a trip like this cost a good deal of money and I was responsible for coming up with most of that money. So I have been fundraising since about March.

My home church decided that they would donate the offering that always goes to Missions towards my missions trip. First off, I was totally surprised and humbled when I found this out. God has really been teaching me about trust, as I was kind of over whelmed by the amount of money I was going to have to come up with in a short amount of time. This was just the first time that I felt God say, "See what happens when you trust me?"

Over the last couple of months I have been working and holding different fundraisers to come up with the money that I needed. My friends have had a huge part in supporting me for my trip. I had a fundraiser at my fraternity at K-State and all of my friends and fraternity brothers supported me through showing up, praying and donating. Than I had several different fundraisers in my hometown and at my home church. The members of my church have overwhelmed me with support! Through a garage sale in which they donated TONS of stuff and offerings that they have taken up for me, I have seen how God has worked through my church family.

But back to the VBS, like I said, tonight was the last night of VBS and they counted up the total that all the kids from my community back home had raised. Not only did they reach their goal of $500 dollars, they raised ever last penny that I needed for my trip! Over $1200! If that doesn't scream that God is in control, I don't know what does.

I cannot praise Him enough for showing me time and time again that He is able to be trusted! God has brought me through a lot this last semester, and I have constantly been stubborn in the lessons He is teaching me, but God is still worthy to be praised! He has shown me so much love! I am overwhelmed with His love!

I cannot thank my community and church enough for the love and support they have shown me. I know that it is all through Christ, but I am so glad He was able to do what He did through those back home.

As I continue to prepare for my trip I am constantly reminded who God is and it is so evident that he is ALREADY working out things for His glory regarding this trip. I can hardly wait 3 more weeks to see what God is going to do in China and through our team! Praise the Good Lord Jesus!

Kyle